Encounter of Pope John Paul with St. Peter: When John Paul got to the Pearly Gates, the following dialogue took place.

St. P: What is your name?

JP: (somewhat taken aback): Why, John Paul, of course. Pope John Paul the second.

St. P: I don’t have a reservation for you. You can’t get in without one.

JP: This is incredible. How can you possibly not recognize me?

St. P: Look, you’re wasting time--there’s a long line behind you waiting to get in. Do you know anybody up here who will vouch for you?

JP: Of course I do. The Father knows me.

St. P (picking up a phone and pushing a button): Hello, Pop, it’s Pete at the Gates. There’s a guy here by the name of John Paul the second who says you know him. (Slight pause) Oh, OK, you don’t. Thanks. (Turning to John Paul) He’s never heard of you. Do you know anybody else?

JP (shaking with outrage): This is unbelievable. Of course, the Son will vouch for me.

St. P (again picking up the phone and again pushing a button): Hello, JC, it’s Pete at the Gates. (He asks the same question as before, with the same slight pause) Oh, OK, Pop didn’t know him either. Thanks, have a good day. (Turning to John Paul) He doesn’t know you either. Look at that line that’s building up behind us. Now, this is your last chance. Is there anybody else up here who will put in a good word for you?

JP (so shaken that he can barely speak): I’m sure the Holy Ghost will tell you who I am. Get him on the line.

St. P (picking up the phone for the third time and pushing a button): Hello, Spook, it’s Pete at the Gates. There’s this guy John Paul the second who wants to get in. Neither Pop nor JC ever heard of him. Do you know him? (A little longer pause this time) OK, OK, I get it. Thanks a lot. (Turning to John Paul) Sure, he knows you. But, do you think he’s going to put in a good word for you after all the gossip about him and the Virgin Mary that you were spreading around down on Earth? Try your luck at some other place.