Parting is such sweet sorrow
How many ways do you end a conversation with someone--in person, on the phone, by e-mail, by letter delivered by the post office (does anybody mail letters anymore?)?
You might just say "goodbye," that's the simplest and most sincere way. You are saying "God be with you." Of course, you can't order God to be with your friend: you don't give orders to God. What you are really saying is that you hope that God will be with him. But that thought is ambiguous. First, what does God being with someone mean? If there is a God, isn't he always with everyone all the time throughout history? (Maybe it's like Jesus being with George Bush in each of the 21 photographs in that wonderful spoof on Bush, Destined For Destiny: The Unauthorized Autobiography of George W. Bush, reviewed in my previous posting Satire is mightier than the sword.) Second, you imply to your friend that maybe God has not been with him for some particular reason--maybe he sinned and fell out of favor with God--and you are hoping that he will behave better and get back in God's grace. Hardly a pleasant thought to convey to your friend.
OK, so much for the philosophising. Back to the original question: How many ways are there to end a conversation? Following are just a few.
I beg to remain, Sir, your most humble and obedient servant. Yes, that was a very common signoff for business letters in the 19th Century. Sometimes the "I beg to remain" was omitted and just the "humble and obedient" was used. Also, sometimes an abbreviation was used: Yr humble and obt svt.
During modern times (at least until e-mails came into being) Yours truly and Sincerely have been in use in the USA. (I still frequently use the latter in business e-mails or faxes, but may well give it up for something less yesteryear.) The British equivalent is Faithfully yours.
The French go way out: Agréez, Monsieur, nos salutations distinguées. (Be aware, Sir, of our distinguished salutations.) They have several other versions, among which is notre parfaite consideration (our perfect consideration)--it's been some time since I've seen that one, but, as I recall, it goes: Assurez vous, Monsieur, de notre parfaite consideration (Be assured, Sir, of our perfect consideration). Whereas the foregoing are more formal business usages, more informal signoffs among acquaintances are often Bien à vous (Well to you), or Bien à toi, (Well to thee) when the familiar form of "you" (the tutoiement) is used.
The Spanish frequently use sin otra cosa, lo saludo atentamente (without anything else (to say), I salute you attentively). If it is a female who is being saluted, it will be la saludo atentamente.
The e-mail has brought about new greetings and signoffs: Hi Joe, blah blah blah. Regards, Harry.
In oral communication (personal or on the phone), I find myself increasingly using the very modern signoffs: "stay cool" and "take care." I used to use "so long" but that is so 20th Century.
The one thing that ties all of the above signoffs together is that they are mostly insincere. It's not that we are being deliberately deceitful when we use them, it's just that it seems cold to suddenly end the conversation or the letter or the e-mail without some sort of pleasantry. So we adhere to custom and say something pleasant as we take leave of the other person.
To put the cart before the horse, a word about greetings in written communication. The "Dear Mr. X" in a business letter (and in most personal letters) is obviously insincere: how can we feel that someone we don't even know is "dear?" "Gentlemen" used to be the preferred form in business letters when one didn't like the "Dear Sirs," but even that form has to give way to modern times. Chances are that at least as many women as men will see the correspondence in question; for that reason I have begun to use "Ladies/Gentlemen." Even then, I am probably being duplicitous in that I don't really know that all of the recipients of my correspondence are, in fact, ladies and/or gentlemen, since I usually don't even know them.
The French, with the most effusive signoffs mentioned above, are the most direct with their greetings in business correspondence: usually simply Monsieur (or Madame). However, politicians or people trying to sell something to the recipient of their correspondence often start off with Cher Monsieur X or Chère Madame Y. (Dear Mr. X or Dear Ms. Y.)
The Spanish often use the greeting Muy señor mío or Muy señora mía ("Very my sir" or "Very my lady," neither of which makes any sense.)
Well, sin otra cosa, Agréez, Dear Readers, my distinguished salutations. Cheers. Stay cool.
You might just say "goodbye," that's the simplest and most sincere way. You are saying "God be with you." Of course, you can't order God to be with your friend: you don't give orders to God. What you are really saying is that you hope that God will be with him. But that thought is ambiguous. First, what does God being with someone mean? If there is a God, isn't he always with everyone all the time throughout history? (Maybe it's like Jesus being with George Bush in each of the 21 photographs in that wonderful spoof on Bush, Destined For Destiny: The Unauthorized Autobiography of George W. Bush, reviewed in my previous posting Satire is mightier than the sword.) Second, you imply to your friend that maybe God has not been with him for some particular reason--maybe he sinned and fell out of favor with God--and you are hoping that he will behave better and get back in God's grace. Hardly a pleasant thought to convey to your friend.
OK, so much for the philosophising. Back to the original question: How many ways are there to end a conversation? Following are just a few.
I beg to remain, Sir, your most humble and obedient servant. Yes, that was a very common signoff for business letters in the 19th Century. Sometimes the "I beg to remain" was omitted and just the "humble and obedient" was used. Also, sometimes an abbreviation was used: Yr humble and obt svt.
During modern times (at least until e-mails came into being) Yours truly and Sincerely have been in use in the USA. (I still frequently use the latter in business e-mails or faxes, but may well give it up for something less yesteryear.) The British equivalent is Faithfully yours.
The French go way out: Agréez, Monsieur, nos salutations distinguées. (Be aware, Sir, of our distinguished salutations.) They have several other versions, among which is notre parfaite consideration (our perfect consideration)--it's been some time since I've seen that one, but, as I recall, it goes: Assurez vous, Monsieur, de notre parfaite consideration (Be assured, Sir, of our perfect consideration). Whereas the foregoing are more formal business usages, more informal signoffs among acquaintances are often Bien à vous (Well to you), or Bien à toi, (Well to thee) when the familiar form of "you" (the tutoiement) is used.
The Spanish frequently use sin otra cosa, lo saludo atentamente (without anything else (to say), I salute you attentively). If it is a female who is being saluted, it will be la saludo atentamente.
The e-mail has brought about new greetings and signoffs: Hi Joe, blah blah blah. Regards, Harry.
In oral communication (personal or on the phone), I find myself increasingly using the very modern signoffs: "stay cool" and "take care." I used to use "so long" but that is so 20th Century.
The one thing that ties all of the above signoffs together is that they are mostly insincere. It's not that we are being deliberately deceitful when we use them, it's just that it seems cold to suddenly end the conversation or the letter or the e-mail without some sort of pleasantry. So we adhere to custom and say something pleasant as we take leave of the other person.
To put the cart before the horse, a word about greetings in written communication. The "Dear Mr. X" in a business letter (and in most personal letters) is obviously insincere: how can we feel that someone we don't even know is "dear?" "Gentlemen" used to be the preferred form in business letters when one didn't like the "Dear Sirs," but even that form has to give way to modern times. Chances are that at least as many women as men will see the correspondence in question; for that reason I have begun to use "Ladies/Gentlemen." Even then, I am probably being duplicitous in that I don't really know that all of the recipients of my correspondence are, in fact, ladies and/or gentlemen, since I usually don't even know them.
The French, with the most effusive signoffs mentioned above, are the most direct with their greetings in business correspondence: usually simply Monsieur (or Madame). However, politicians or people trying to sell something to the recipient of their correspondence often start off with Cher Monsieur X or Chère Madame Y. (Dear Mr. X or Dear Ms. Y.)
The Spanish often use the greeting Muy señor mío or Muy señora mía ("Very my sir" or "Very my lady," neither of which makes any sense.)
Well, sin otra cosa, Agréez, Dear Readers, my distinguished salutations. Cheers. Stay cool.
posted by Mycroft Watson at 6:49 PM
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1 Comments:
A good fridnd of mine ffom past years often used the salutation, "Gentle Folk" when writing to unknown parties. Since I got your Blog addrss from a mutual friend I suppose you are "Gentle Watson". At least from your posts I assume you are "gentle"
Jcurmudge
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